My Essay Got Deleted From Pof

This is one of the most common questions we are asked in the thousands of emails our customer service team receives daily. The simple answer is that you broke one of the rules of the site. With 88 million users worldwide and a lean team of 75 employees, it’s imperative that we establish and enforce a number of rules to ensure the site remains safe, free, and committed to helping our users find a genuine connection. On PlentyOfFish, 95% of our users are looking to date or find a relationship, and they comply with the rules of the site. These are the users to whom we cater our time and resources. Unfortunately, the other 5% who don’t follow the rules are immediately banned from the site. We’d ideally like to respond to every email and explain to each user why they were deleted, but with a small team, this just isn’t possible. Our focus will always be on those who are using the site as it was intended; to find a date and/or relationship.

If you were deleted from the site and don’t know why, here are some of the reasons this may have happened:

1. You are looking for casual sex. Once upon a time we allowed singles who were looking for ‘intimate encounters’ to sign up and use the site. Over a year ago, we updated our rules and removed this small group of users from the site. We have not allowed them back since. Our ultimate goal is to help singles find dates and relationships, and those looking for casual sex hinder our ability to do this. If you’re clearly just looking for one thing (and we have our ways of determining this), you’ll be deleted from the site.












2. You are married (and not separated). If we haven’t said it enough just yet, PlentyOfFish is for people who are looking to date and find a relationship. If you’re married, you are already committed to someone else. If we determine that you indeed have a spouse, you’ll be deleted immediately. May we recommend another site that’s much more suitable for you.

3. You are a scammer, a spammer, a fake, underage, or are soliciting a business. The PlentyOfFish is renowned in its industry for its sophisticated scam detection system. This system intercepts almost 98% of the potential users listed above, before they are even able to sign up. These are two of the 2% who got away…











4. You are rude to other users. If you’re rude or send inappropriate messages to other users, this will likely result in getting blocked by these users. If you are being blocked too frequently, you will be deleted. Furthermore, PlentyOfFish has zero tolerance for any kind of discrimination related race, sex, disability, sexual orientation etc.









5. You post inappropriate photos. Nude and inappropriate photos are not permitted on the site. See  #1. PlentyOfFish has access to advanced software as well as an active user base who help flag these inappropriate photos. When we find them (and we will, even if they are hidden), your profile will be deleted.








6. You login from a country where PlentyOfFish doesn’t exist yet. PlentyOfFish is always expanding into new markets, but if you do login from a country where we don’t yet have a presence, your account may be flagged and deleted.

If none of the above apply to you, it is possible that you may have deleted mistakenly (although this is rare).

PlentyOfFish is constantly working to improve the site to ensure our users have a positive experience. Maintaining the site as a place where relationships are created and users are safe will always be our highest priority. Anyone who negatively impacts users around them and the intention of the site, will not be welcomed back.

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.

Reasons Girls Delete their POF profilePage 1 of 1    
I have this burning question that I need answered. This has happened to me three times now. And the most recent I think happened today. I want to know what motivates a girl to suddenly deleter her profile...seemingly out of the blue. I will put this into context. I was just recently talking to someone for the past two weeks. After exchanging a few messages on POF we then exchanged numbers and talked over the phone and texted. I then asked her if she would be interested in getting coffee, she said yes. We made plans for this last sunday but then two hours before we were to meet she texts me that she got pulled into work for an emergency and couldn't make it. Now I'm not dumb, I take that as a pretty clear sign as her not being interested in me. I replied to her text "Thats okay, I understand. Let me know if you are still interested in meeting and we can reschedule". Hours go by and at 7pm I get another text her apologizing for cancelling our first date. I reply with essentially the same text "No problem, these things happen. Let me know if you would still like to meet and we can make plans". I left it at that and never heard back from her.

Okay, pretty much end of story, right? That is a very clear message she just was not interested in me. I'm totally fine with that. What confuses me greatly though is that today I was on POF again and I noticed she deleted her profile? That strikes me as very odd. I did not pursue her of pester her in any creepy way. Why go to the trouble of deleting your profile? Was this an act of anger, annoyance, or did she suddenly want nothing to do with POF? I bring this up because something similar to this has happened to me at least two other times. Again, I never overly pursue women or do anything creepy to bother them. I just stop talking to them in one way or another and then they delete their profile. What does that mean?

Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/2/2013 9:10:26 PM
They met someone.
They had fake/old photos posted.
They were annoyed or overwhelmed with the abundance of messages received.
They were never single.
They are too scared to meet strangers from the internet.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/2/2013 9:11:15 PM
OP, no matter that you guys spoke really have no way of knowing what's going on in her RL and for me to speculate as to her reasons would be pointless...suffice to say, she's gone...move on to the next one...this applies to any of the others that abruptly disappeared on you.

i too deleted once...wanted off here, there's one explanation but honestly, it could be absolutely anything...key is not to think it's because of 'you'...

just forget it, move on and keep looking ...


Joined: 3/5/2013
Msg: 4
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/2/2013 10:02:21 PM
Agree with the others.

(What makes you think this has anything to do with you?)

Edit: joined in 2010 and you've only had this happen 3 times, which obviously breaks down to once a year, and this is your burning question?

Here's MY burning question. With such a great profile, (education, good job, sense of humor) what the hell is going on here? On paper, you're a great catch! Something's fishy.


Relationship is all about honestly and trust right? So why not say I changed my mind or look I found someone else, that sort of things that makes sense of why she has to whatever she feels she got to do.

Because you're not in a relationship with these women and they owe you no explanation for leaving.
It only takes one guy cursing you out for politely declining his overtures before you decide politely declining is NOT a good idea.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/2/2013 10:09:56 PM
No one deletes her profile because of you. If they don't want to talk to JUST YOU again, all they have to do is block you (they can do that on phone too if you have the number).

So don't feel bad in that way, okay? This must be quite disappointing after three times, and there I don't think I can say anything that'll make that part of it feel better, but I promise you, you did not drive three women off the site. Not noway, not nohow.

Did you do username searches to make sure all three did, in fact, self-delete? I'm not questioning it with this last one because, the way the off-site communication went, I would guess she got back together with someone. But if you didn't check, either or both of the other two might have been deleted by the site, in which case, you dodged a big ugly bullet. You have to commit some serious infractions to get deleted here.

Other likely reasons have been covered very well above already.

Also, your dogcat is crazy adorable! I used to have one of those, too. She fetched!
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/2/2013 10:11:52 PM
Same thing happened to me, what I dont understand is why not be straight forward about it. Relationship is all about honestly and trust right? So why not say I changed my mind or look I found someone else, that sort of things that makes sense of why she has to whatever she feels she got to do.

Idk but I think woman talks about relationships online as if it is a different issue compared what is going on in real life.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:10:44 AM
I've had that happen..went out on a date with a guy, then the next day he deletes his profile and is never heard from again.

I have long stopped online dating, or trying to analyze the "whys" of stuff like this.

It's easy in cyberland to slip away...there is the pretense that we dont owe anyone anything, so, people just vanish.

Not worth thinking about.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:55:17 AM

I have this burning question that I need answered.

And so this was your burning question? How in the world would WE know why some random woman deleted her profile? This happened to you 3 times in 3 years and its driving you crazy? JAY-SUS

It must be a full moon.

Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:59:31 AM
A burning question? Sounds like you have an underlying medical condition? Have you been practicising safe sex? Sometimes even talking to a stranger can lead to an STI.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 10:35:21 AM
One act of delay or a cancellation does NOT always mean they want 'out' forever, but...

It does get annoying if you always have to be the 'starter' of the conversation, whether it be an online chat or you doing the calling. You have to take it somewhat as a bad sign if they cannot call you first, or message you to start a conversation after you've talked for some time. If they are always 'replying' to your calls and messages, I'd take it as a serious sign of hesitance or being dis-interested.

If they are holding up their end of the conversation well, and HAVE called you/texted you first - well, that's different. If they cancel one meet and don't talk for 24 hours - it's not the end of the world. Emergencies DO happen. Phone batteries crap out or fall in the toilet. You may not know exactly what happened for a day or so, but your mind will jump to 72 different conclusions in less than five minutes. You gotta dial back that 'thinking' part and just wait a day or two to see if their lives have settled well enough again to TRY again.

Part of the problem with impatience is that assumption that texts can always be IMMEDIATELY replied back within seconds of the first transmission. I have a 40 minute commute to work, and my gal has this extraordinary ability to send a text in the afternoon less than five seconds AFTER I get on the freeway going 70 miles and hour. Sorry, but she's gotta wait at least a half hour until I get home - she knows it, and respects it - and trusts I WILL eventually reply back.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 11:09:51 AM
Besides the game-players (liars, cheaters, etc.), the ones that met someone, or are taking a break. People disappear because that's how they deal with things; To them, the internet just isn't real, it's like a television set.

They ventured somewhere they think they shouldn't be (or don't 'need' to be), and simply shut it off. Am convinced they pretend it never happened (like a dirty little secret.) Pretty common - heck, you see it in the forums on a regular basis... :::poof::: They're gone.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 2:14:37 PM
Your profile reads a little snotty and petty and opinionated. If you carry on like that all the time you maybe scaring the ladies away. Just saying.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 4:14:55 PM
Its also possible that she blocked you. Why? Who the heck knows!
This happens all the time around here. To both men and woman. Shrug...
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:17:48 PM
Well, one thing that I have definitely learned is that don't go to a POF forum to post a sincere question. I had a genuine question and I wasn't making any snide remarks or denigrating anyone. I just wanted real advice.

What do I get? I get douche bags like "cowboy" replying with an asinine remarks. "Cowboy", you are an idiot, and based on your response you didn't really read my question. What's even more amazing is that you took the time out of your day to write a stupid statement that helps no one. If you don't like my question, then just move along with your life loser.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:33:51 PM

Hours go by and at 7pm I get another text her apologizing for cancelling our first date. I reply with essentially the same text "No problem, these things happen. Let me know if you would still like to meet and we can make plans". I left it at that and never heard back from her.

Maybe you should have's possible that she was waiting for you to initiate the next date-to-be.

I knew one lady who cancelled because of all the obnoxious e-mail (with photos of their "junk") she was getting.
That last girl of yours doesn't need your approval to cancel her profile., nor is she obligated to tell you since you have her phone number.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 7:49:31 PM
Hmm been here for about 3 years. Maybe someone will ask that when you delete.
Maybe someone will ask that when I will delete! Lol I will maybe become like a dead celebrity
And then get my comeback lol.

In any case you shouldn't get too hung up on it. It's better to move over to another
There is also a bunch of variables too. Admin deleted it, she got tired/ someone recognized her,
Chances are if she is talking to you she is talking to the other 7 to 1 male to female populace and maybe
Checked out with someone she found more interesting.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/3/2013 8:16:41 PM
If you can, for a moment, not take his comment so personally,
I think Cowboy's comment provides some perspective that could be helpful.

The gist is that most people would *not* put 3 incidents in 3 years in the "burning question" category.
What we're all saying is that it belongs in the "coincidental/nothing personal" category.

But the fact that you reacted to his comment so personally makes me understand why you would take 3 profile deletions personally.
Maybe introspect a little--do you often feel that others' actions are essentially reactions to you and something you've done or said?
If so, do you have direct evidence to support that, or is it just a thought or suspicion you have?
Maybe you are not as influential as you think.
I'm not trying to insult you, but as my grandmother used to say as I put on make-up before leaving the house,
"Let's go! No one is looking at you any way."
This could come as a relief to you if, indeed, you have a habit of thinking actions and events directly relate back to you.
Reasons Girls Delete their POF profile
Posted: 4/4/2013 12:04:15 AM
Cactuspoacher, users get in the forum for a reason(s), not just to create any scenario of making the thread writer angry...if the guy wanted to make a point or wanted out out his advice..he should have approach the owner of this thread with decency and respect and gives his answers right away..did he ask for his cynical analysis on how this guy did which resulted in having this girl deleted his profile? The answer is NO! in my opinion, then again it is just my opinion and with no disrespect to no one on here, I would suggest that anyone should stick to the seriousness of the question rather than some slightly unbalanced give away answers or reply that leads to nowhere but more questions to be answered which literally ends up in more raging outburst that provides no solutions or real answers to the question.

I think most comments in any given thread/thread are opinionated, where ever it came from and who ever is giving it. therefore such meaningless approach should not be taken seriously at all in my opinion.
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